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Rick Geissal's avatar

Steve, here's mine, from my substack, re public executions and what will result therefrom.

I can definitely see the ads being sponsored by Amazon. Yep, Jeff Bezos is the one who will glory in “The Show: The Nation’s First Televised, Live-Streamed Public Execution,” and he will get plenty of viewers who will demand more and more of them. Crowds, especially in Europe long ago and in the Deep South much more recently, used to spend some Saturdays watching public executions in huge throngs. People would come for the day, from miles around. You think I'm kidding? There were greeting cards made with photos of the executions; people—execution fans—mailed them to friends & family all over the country, with notes of the events of the day: “Grandma, we had the best time. You shoulda seen that feller twitch! Ooh, it was good. And there was barbecue, beer, and cornbread. Mama said there was refried beans & okra, but I never seed none.”

It was better than Market Day, plus a picnic! Those days might come again, with eating and beer booths, kids jumping and laughing, playing with sticks and marbles, just like the good old days. In some places, I predict there will be hayrides afterward, and lovers will sneak kisses in the corner of the lottery tent. There will be countdowns: 10, 9, 8, 7 …. And door prizes! “Hey, Aunt Sally—you done won a hair dryer! Come on down!” FanDuel & BetMGM will promote betting on which body parts of the prisoner are hit first—and most—and on which shooters—who will, no doubt, be given sporting nicknames—hit which places on the dying/dead man’s body. When a woman is the prisoner/victim/star(?) you can imagine the nature of the bets.

Most likely my own Senator Corn Pone, John Kennedy, will be the announcer, sounding much like Howard Cosell on Monday Night Football, long ago. Or maybe it will be some ambitious MAGA politician; I can see some idiot like Missouri Senator Eric Schmitt, who made such a fool of himself last week in his public interrogation of Jack Smith, or Lauren Boebert, who would—no doubt—do a bang-up job of announcing!

Yep, the Secretary of Death, Whiskey Pete, has created something for his legacy, something that may outlive the story of his total incapacity as Secretary of Defense. Televised public executions may well become a Rorschach test between "the woke" and “Real ‘Mericans.” Amazon Prime will pay to have exclusive rights to all US public executions—no doubt will bid for more public executions worldwide and will pay enormous sums to North Korea, Iran, China, and Afghanistan, helping to support those horrible, bloodthirsty regimes— and whenever there is the least glimmer of a hint or rumor from Amazon that it might stop these telecasts there will be enormous uprisings from Trumpist media, threatening that millions of consumers will boycott Amazon (and create nasty, belittling messages about Bezos and his wife). David Brooks will write a column asserting “Liberals … something, something … Obama … concern … phony … fad … drift … something something … Mamdani … trans people.” Susan Collins will claim that she authored it, and Brooks stole it.

Kathleen Weber's avatar

"And if you liked it, please help spread the word!"

I cannot imagine any reader liking this particular post. a new national low....

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